Finding out one of your kids is on the autism spectrum isn’t easy, especially because we’re still learning about how these kids can best be taught to interact as productive members of society. It can be a scary pill for parents to swallow. The good news is this: more and more information is available year by year. We’re learning. We’re growing. And we’re all helping one another up and over these challenging obstacles.
There are a lot of things many parents of a child on the spectrum wished they had known before diagnosis. Here are just a few:
- Although those on the spectrum might be invisible before interaction takes place, it doesn’t mean that completely separate medical issues won’t impact your child in mysterious (and unwanted) ways. A bout of diarrhea or stomach bug can wreak havoc on someone who is on the spectrum, but the victim won’t always shout out his or her symptoms. You won’t always know what’s wrong, but you’ll know something is up. Many parents wish they’d known how to communicate during these scenarios ahead of time.
- Doctors can be wrong, and often are. Parental instincts shouldn’t be ignored, and that means that sometimes it can be necessary to hunt down the second opinion you think will justify your concerns, which are often right on point. A proper diagnosis for someone on the spectrum means a lifetime worth of personalized, appropriate treatment and a real chance at living a “normal” life by the time adulthood comes around.
- Many parents are misguided into thinking their child doesn’t have a normal range of emotions during the early stages after diagnosis. This couldn’t be further from the truth. Autistic kids and others who experience similar diagnoses feel just as much as anyone else. Sometimes they likely feel even more. The difference lies in how they learn to express it.
- A child on the spectrum can mean change for the better. These struggles won’t just help parent and child learn to interact during the traditionally problematic years of adolescence, they will lead you to become that much closer. The entire family is more likely to learn patience, empathy, and compassion by having your child in their lives.
- Those on the spectrum don’t require a cure, they require constant support, learning, and human interaction on a deeper level than most other kids, who are more independent. They’re different. They’re unique. They’re not broken.
- When a baby cries, it means something: hunger, dirty diaper, no attention, etc. Kids on the spectrum don’t always use words to communicate even when they grow older, which can be a tremendous burden on parents. But the “enthusiastic” behavior always means something. It’s the parent’s job to figure out what that something is.